Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
