Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
