So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize