Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
