i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
