Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
