People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
