if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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