we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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