..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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