in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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