i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
