Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So vagazzling was a success
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
