gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
