Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
