you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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