I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
