TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize
