Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
