i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize
