I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize