RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
