i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
