ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
