I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
