I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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