You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My balls are so social today.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize
