Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
