Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
