Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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