Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
