It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
