take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
