Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
