Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
