I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
You need a sexual gate keeper
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
