I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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