kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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