we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
PANTIES FOUND
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
