i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
this just has baby written all over it
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
