I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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