Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
