U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
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