Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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