at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Dick very happy bro
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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