Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
