And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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