Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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