butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
