If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
porn star boner night. come get it.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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