i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
