Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Sex in the backyard? Check.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
